Traffic

There were plenty of memorable things about Cairo, but perhaps one of the most memorable is the roads. It's a sprawling city of somewhere around 20 million people...and not a single traffic light that anyone actually heeds. I thought I had seen chaotic driving when I was in Beirut last year, but Beirut is like Basel compared to Cairo. I would rather drive a car blindfolded through Rome than try to drive in Cairo.



I loved this sign, because telling drivers not to honk their horns is like telling people not to breathe. Liberal use of the car horn is apparently a requirement, which is especially helpful at night since most drivers seem to prefer not to use their headlights. Near as I could tell, the car horn could be used for any of the following reasons:

• "Would you like a taxi? Are you sure? Really?"


• "Passing on your left/right."


• "Please, pass on my left/right."


• "Hello, stranger, and welcome to Egypt!"


• "I could use a falafel right about now...mmmmmm, falafel."


• "Does this work?"...(HONK)..."Does it still work?"...(HONK)..."What about now?"...(HONK)...


• "I know you're walking 100 feet away, but I just want to make absolutely sure you don't suddenly get the urge to dash across 3 lanes of traffic and get in my way."


• "I'm not wearing any pants."


• "I hereby reaffirm my very existence."


• "It's quiet...TOO quiet."

Perhaps best of all were the taxi rides. Since it's such a sprawling, pedestrian-unfriendly city, the best way to get around was in local taxis, most of which had the feel and exhaust output of 30-year old Soviet-era castoffs. If I had to choose one word to describe a ride in a Cairo taxi, it would be Inshallah (God willing), as in "I have faith that this driver will get me safely to my destination, Inshallah." What then ensued was 20-30 minutes of jockeying for position in traffic, honking, narrowly avoiding pedestrians, honking, passing donkey carts on narrow dirt roads with oncoming traffic, honking, lighting up a cigarette (perhaps to mask the gasoline fumes?), etc. Certainly a better adrenaline rush than any roller coaster, and a great way to see the city. This is a lousy picture, but we were in the heart of downtown--the most modern part of the city--when this guy came flying in front of us on the way to the airport:



If it's difficult to imagine driving, imagine being a pedestrian. If you need to cross the road, you're basically on your own (the Inshallah principle at work again). While not all the roads are this large, it is fairly typical in that there are no traffic lights and no stoppages (other than when traffic gets backed up), so if you want to cross you need nerves of steel and lightning reflexes...both of which, evidently, Cairenes have in abundance.